


A Warm Welcome

by Ruth EJ Booth (RuthEJBooth)



Category: World of Warcraft
Genre: Molten Core (Warcraft), Other, World of Warcraft: Classic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-04
Updated: 2019-11-04
Packaged: 2021-01-22 11:47:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,183
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21301547
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RuthEJBooth/pseuds/Ruth%20EJ%20Booth
Summary: Majordomo Executus introduces a new group of mortal "insects" to the hallowed core of Ragnaros's lair.
Kudos: 2





	A Warm Welcome

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Rowan Atkinson Live - The Devil 'Toby' welcomes you to Hell](https://archiveofourown.org/external_works/531626) by Rowan Atkinson. 

My name is Majordomo Executus – good morning – and I’m delighted to welcome you here to Molten Core, the mortal plane residence of Ragnaros, the Elemental Lord of Fire. Can I get you anything before we begin? A lava spritzer, perhaps? No? Then let us proceed with the tour. Can’t keep the master waiting.

I’ve been Majordomo of this residence for only about three hundred years now, since the former leader of the Dark Iron Dwarves, his highness Sorcerer-Thane Thaurissan, accidentally summoned Ragnaros when he lost a round of snap in a game with the Seven during the War of the Three Hammers. A rather unfortunate mistake on his part – though it has meant that his son, the current Emperor, hasn’t had to worry about the relatives popping round unexpectedly for a few centuries, which frankly, we’re rather glad about. I understand they’re rather rambunctious when drunk – not really our sort of people at all. We do have standards to maintain here.

Having said that, I’m afraid we did cause a bit of a stir when we first moved to the neighbourhood. The destruction of most of a mountain range doesn’t tend to endear you to the neighbours, but I think that since then we’ve reached something of an entente cordiale with them. I think they’ve recognized that the benefits of an orcish deterrent, as well as endless free hot water, far outweigh the downsides of a potential weakness in the boundaries of the mortal realm resulting in the potential destruction of everything and everyone they hold dear. These days they tend to leave us alone, save the odd incursion to rescue a lost macguffin of some sort. I don’t know why it happens whenever you create a base of operations for an elemental god. First plane problems, I suppose. 

But I digress. As you can see, we’ve kept most of the original décor – the smooth cavern interiors, the classic Dark Iron frameworking. It is quite different to the grandeur of the master’s usual residence in Sulfuron Keep, certainly. However, I must say, Thaurissan’s family have kept this place in remarkable condition, and we’ve tried to stay true to that as far as possible. You can see we’ve added some touches of our own – the molten lava motif is of course a longstanding favourite of the master’s – but we’ve kept it largely rustic and down-to-earth here. Quite literally in some respects. That’s a little joke of mine. Mostly.

We try to make this place inclusive, as you can see. We have people from all walks of life here – not just Flamewakers, but Firesworn, Molten Giants, even Flame Imps are welcome, as long as they don’t get too underfoot. And of course, the master loves his core hounds. My apologies to any of you with allergies or sensitivity to magma. Although perhaps you should have considered that before you stepped into a lair called the Molten Core. 

You see, the Firelord wanted somewhere where all the veterans of Elemental Sundering could come together and reminisce over old times, as well as prepare for the inevitable end times when we will raze the surface of the world and retake what is ours by force. As a result, you may notice a distinct lack of dwarves around here. I’m afraid to say, we had to banish them. I hate to be indiscreet, but they did have a rather particular smell – burning flesh, mostly – and it was upsetting some of the guests.

People ask me what it’s like working for the Firelord. He’s a very considerate employer, doesn’t cause too much of a fuss. Indeed, he spends most of his hours asleep in preparation for – oops, can’t mention that just yet. Naughty Majordomo! He’s not very good at rising with an alarm: he does keep complaining I’ve woken him too early. On the other hand, he doesn’t like the feeling other people have been in his chambers without his permission, which can make changing the bed linen a little tricky. I suspect he may be having difficulty adjusting to his current, less hectic schedule after thousands of years of elemental combat. Despite that, I do think the Firelord enjoys the restfulness of living on the mortal plane. It certainly is a vast improvement from being trapped in his own domain. As I’m sure you may realise, “taste the flames of Sulfuron” loses something of its sting when you're already standing in a churning pit of molten agony. 

On the other hand, he is still a little sensitive about the whole Azeroth-bound avatar thing. He doesn’t like to be reminded that he is currently operating at a fraction of his full power right now, as he does tend to worry that he’s lost it a bit. So, do be sure to make some dramatic gasps and exclamations when he does emerge. I find that cowering helps, possibly even some weeping and wailing, if you can muster it. Instant conversion to the cult of Ragnaros goes down very well. And this should go without saying, but please don’t attempt to toast marshmallows on him. I don’t mean to tell tales out of school, but I’m afraid the Emperor did lose a battalion that way, unsurprisingly. He is our penitent and craven host, but I do wonder about him sometimes. I think it’s his dwarven upbringing. 

As for myself, if I may be permitted a moment of reflection, I admit that acting as Majordomo is a bit of a change of pace from the intense Flamewaker Elite lifestyle of the early days of Azeroth, with the constant battling against the Hydraxian Warlords and the other elemental factions. I do get a bit of good-natured ribbing from some of the Sons of Flame in the Fire Pit – that’s our local ex-pat bar – of a Friday night. ‘What did you expect to end up doing with a name like 'Executus'’, and that sort of thing. But I enjoy it. It’s a nice retirement after millennia at the vanguard of elemental destruction. A body needs a change of pace as one gets older: the chance to put your tail up, make use of your other skills.

My Mother, fire purge her, is very proud, very proud. She’s a cleaner in Sulfuron Keep. She’s the one who keeps the runes lit. You’d be surprised how difficult that can be in a land of eternal flame and darkness, finding enough fuel to last an eternity, but I understand that won’t be a problem for too much longer. Sorry, mustn’t talk too much about that right now. Spoil the surprise and that.

And here we have the chamber of our lord himself. I’ll just let him know you’re here. I’m sure he’d be delighted to know he has visitors after so long. Don’t worry if he seems a little grumpy at first, he’s not really a morning person. Also, I hope you’ve washed your hands, he’s very big on cleanliness. Likes to get a hand in to the cleaning himself every so often. With fire. 

Well, here we go then. Lord! Lord! The "mortal infidels" are here!


End file.
